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'Tis better to be drunk on the spirit; however, a bottle of Jack Daniel's is sometimes handier. ---- Bono

Lambs Graze in Green as Ewe2 Exercise Rights

Irish Times
Informed that Bono and the Edge from U2 were planning to tend sheep in Dublin's St. Stephen's Green, media representatives were convinced the wool was being pulled over their eyes.

Apparently the latest Freemen of Dublin had scanned the small print and discovered that one of their privileges was the right to graze sheep on common ground. By 2:30 p.m. yesterday all doubters were silenced by the lambs who began bleating loudly from a trailer outside the park gate. Then we were told that Bono and the Edge would be here in "two shakes of a lamb's tail."

Clad in black, the two rock stars strode through the green, each carrying a lamb. "They are a lot easier to handle than pop stars," said Bono in one of his less prophetic moments. The Lamb of God, sorry Bono, was evidently the black sheep of the family because the animal chose this moment to answer a call of nature on the left sleeve of the singer's expensive-looking leather coat.

A seemingly unperturbed Bono said looking after the lambs was like tending his own musical flock, henceforth known as Ewe2. "They crap on me too," he joked.

For a moment it looked as though the woolly creatures could be lambs to the slaughter with Bono suggesting it was time for Sunday lunch. "They are not spring lambs," he added quickly, as the bleating grew more shrill.

Asked for the names of the animals, Wicklow farmer and lambowner Mr. Bob Douglas said they didn't have any, his farm obviously being the kind of place Where the Sheep Have No Name. Bono and Edge soon redressed this. Edge called his "My Little Lamb" and Bono revealed that his was called "Michael Jackson" -- "Because he is Baaaaad."

There were no members of the ISPCA present but one onlooker observed that being forced to listen to Bono was cruelty in anyone's book.

Still clinging to the wriggling lamb, Bono said receiving the Freedom of the City on Saturday had been "about the best night in all of our lives" but that he was feeling "very unfree in the hangover stakes."

Elsewhere in the city, the St. Patrick's Day festivities continued with the "TV3 Big Day Out" which attracted thousands to the city centre.

The "Bouncy Day Out" would have been more appropriate; Westmoreland Street, College Green and Dame Street were bursting with every kind of inflatable amenity as the city wrung the last ounce of fun out of the national holiday.

Forget bouncy castles; there were bouncy cottages, slides, bungees and even an obstacle course among the entertainments. Children that way inclined could dress up as sumo wrestlers in huge pink rubber costumes bumping bellies with each other.

The best thing was that most of the fun, including beverages, snacks and balloons, were free so parents wouldn't be fleeced, the inevitable fate awaiting Bono and the Edge's new friends.

© 2000 Irish Times. All rights reserved.